Holiday Shopping Fun and Pain for all
by surforst
Summary: Story contest entry. Posted it here for the rest of you. Anyway involves Christmas shopping. Little bit of this and a little bit of that.


**Holiday Shopping. Fun and Pain for all.**

I.

"What do you think Mon? Would this look good on my Dad?" Monique paused as she looked up from the bin she was going through. Splashes of bright colors forgotten she looked over to the red head who was holding a gray sweater.

"Doesn't your Dad already have one?"

"That's the point." With a smile the red head headed up to the counter.

"If you say so Kim by the way what are you going to get Ron?" Monique watched her friend like a hawk at this point. Monique inner couple's radar went on full alert.

"I don't know. I was thinking of picking up a box set of that Fearless Ferret series." Monique smiled as she watched Kim chew her lower lip.

"So the boy's into a Ferret show now?"

"Apparently considering he did dress up as one."

"Should I ask why?"

"Not really."

"So how'd he look?"

"What? I guess he looked like Ron."

"So cute in an adorable puppy dog sort of way." Monique smiled as Kim shot her a death glare at that last comment. The slight pink tinge to the cheeks revealed another hit to the best friend wall.

'Soon my master plan of getting those two together will finally succeed. I am so the cupid version of Dark Space Mask.'

"So girl ever consider picking up any clothes for Ron?" Monique watched as Kim looked back a confused look on her face.

"Mr. Smarty Mart. I'm sure he'll freak out if I buy him anything name brand."

"How about a belt?"

"For what?"

"Well you always tell me about how his pants fall down."

"Ron doesn't need a belt." Kim again had the pink tinge to her cheeks as her eyes got that vacant far away look. Monique saw her chance to move in for the kill.

"I see. So you don't mind his pants dropping on missions?"

Kim frowned as she looked at Monique. "It's Ron. Why would I care if his pants are down?"

"So you'll of course buy him the belt."

"No I think he'd rather have the DVDs." Kim by this time now had the full blush going. Smiling Monique moved over to a nearby bin.

Reaching inside she drew out the object she had selected earlier. Holding it up, she looked over at Kim. "By the way do you think Ron's got a pair like this?"

"Yeah he wears those types when he goes to the Rocket Booster thing." Monique looked down at the rocket patterned boxer with a smile on her face. Kim by this point had her mouth open and a full blush going on.

"I see. Maybe I should consult with you more when it comes to buying Ron's underwear."

Monique barely stopped herself from laughing as Kim threw her a death glare. Turning the Red head made her way to the counter.

'Score one for the Ron man there.' Monique followed after her friend. Her job for the day was now done.

II.

"No I don't want to use a shopping cart. I just want to order the product. Shego!" Drakken spun in his chair looking for his loyal sidekick. Ok maybe not so loyal.

"What do you want Dr. D."

"Ah there you are Shego." Smiling Drakken eyes finally feel upon his constant companion. She was almost like a dog in a sense though with a lot more of a vicious bite.

Standing up he walked the short distance towards the lawn chair she recline on. He could feel the heat coming off the lamp above her. "Honestly I don't know why you bother with this Shego. You never tan no matter how you try. Isn't it rather pointless?"

Growling the green skinned villainess looked up. "What do you want know Dr. D. It better be good mind you or I'm going to make you regret it."

"Green flame regret." Drakken voice sounded weak even to him. Though in his defense Shego was scary when she was mad.

With a growl Drakken realized that he had better keep this moving. "Yes I'm trying to shop on-line for Christmas. They say it saves time after all and I'm all about saving time."

"Is that why you spent three days making one batch of Coco-Moo?"

"Shego I would have expected better of you." Shaking his head he looked with shock down at his employee. "Everyone knows that making Coco-Moo is never a waste of time. Though this is an important point it is not the one I'm concerned with. That blasted machine will not cooperate with me!" Raising a pointy figure he looked back with hate towards the monitor. It still mocked him.

It appeared that Shego had decided that the better part of valor was to just do it herself. Rising she went over the machine and typed in a few things. "Nope that's got to go. That too." She continued to mumble as she moved things around.

Finally Drakken saw the credit card screen pop up. "Ah yes excellent. Now just let me…"

'She knows my credit card number!' Staring in shock Drakken watched as she finished the order.

"There done. I changed a few things of course."

"Like what?" Drakken was annoyed that the sidekick would dare modify the order her boss had laid forth.

"Well first off I order myself a jacket that actually matched. Just because I like green doesn't mean I like that green Dr. D! After that I order Kimmie a nice new outfit. The kind you're not legally allowed to see." Drakken frowned at this.

"I hardly think it appropriate to send my arch-foe underwear."

"Oh she won't think it's from you. Let's just say Daddy Possible going to have a few questions for the buffoon." Drakken smiled and noticed that Shego had a similar expression on her face.

"Excellent."

III.

Ron stared down at the blue fox in front of him. Watching it carefully he attempted to discern from it the mysteries of the universe. Alright he was actually trying to figure out where to put the note but it sounded better the other way.

"I don't know Rufus should it go on the neck?" Looking over he saw the yellow and pink blob pop up from the tray of nachos. Not Bueno Nacho quality mind you but for a mall food court it would do.

"Neck. Neck." The little rodent repeated the simple word as he nodded eagerly. Ron smiled as he placed the not in the little red color of the stuffed animal.

"I hope Kim likes her present. What do you think of the note little buddy?" The rodent gave its owner a thumbs up before diving in. Smiling Ron looked at the piece of paper the conveyed his emotions.

'Will she say yes?' His mind was running wildly with the possibilities but the potential success outweighed the risk in the end.

"Hey man did you get that present for Sarah?" Ron head popped up. The voice he dreaded most in the world was coming from the other side of the wall separator. The man Monkey was here. Not the genetic freak but the one of pure evil.

"Nah you know how it is Josh. Can't possibly make a girl happy. I figure some stupid stuffed animal will do in the end."

"If you say so Mike." Laughter came at a slightly lower angel then the previous time the voice had sounded. It appeared his dreaded enemy had taken his seat.

'One day I will prove him to be the evil incarnate Monkey demon he is!'

"By the way have you got a present for that Kim girl yet?" Ron ears perked up on that.

"Man I've told you already we broke up."

"Really when?" The confused voice of Mike could be heard. Ron couldn't understand how a decent guy like that could befriend Monkey boy like that. He'd always treated Ron well though truth be told he had avoided talking to him. Kim too so Ron just chalked it up to a generally shyness.

"She dumped me remember?" Josh voice was obviously irritated at this point.

"Kim? I thought she liked you."

"Apparently I didn't pay enough attention to her. Hard to do when she's always hanging around that loser pet of hers."

"Her pet? Possible is into that kinky stuff. Lucky guy!" Ron frowned at that. Was Mike that bad with names, faces, and people in general?

"Wouldn't be surprised. Kim was always the little slut." Ron barely kept himself from leaping the wall at that point. One thing to call him a loser but Kim was the only decent thing in his life. Except for his parents, Felix, Rufus, Mexican food, the missions, GWA, and other things. The principal still held though!

"Hey man calm down. We both know that you're as pure as the driven snow so Possible couldn't have done anything."

"How the heck do you know that!" Josh voice was really irritated at this point.

"Call it a friend thing ok? Besides I know Possible."

"Apparently you don't. You should have seen her with the big puppy dog eyes. She'll chase anything with a pretty face." Ron could have sworn he heard the sneer in Josh's voice.

"Wow she really hurt you man. Besides I've know Possible since elementary. That girl knows as much about that as she does about cooking. I recall her blowing up the dojo kitchen once after all."

"She went to your dojo?"

"Well it was more of a challenge. After beating all the students her age down she wanted to thank Sensei for the experience. She tried to make a sandwich. Never did figure out what type."

"That means she took you down too." Josh voice showed his clear enjoyment of catching his friend here. Pure evil was the only way to describe the boy.

"Yeah!" Mike voice showed his apparent dislike of this subject. "Girl must be some sort of mutant or something. I've never seen anyone fight that good before. Thing is she's only gotten better too. Real annoying."

Laughing Josh sat back. "Ok maybe I'm blowing off a little steam here. Though I still think the girl's probably easy as that Bonnie chick. I just feel bad for her pet. Poor guy follows her around to the point where she's probably annoyed with him." Ron felt his heart shudder at that comment. Was he annoying Kim?

"Hey man that's love. Not like we mere mortals can explain it. Besides I figure Possible enjoys the little guy hanging around her. He is her emotional harbor after all." Good old Mike!

"You saying the guy has a chance?" Ron sat up straighter listening in. Hoping for someone to support them.

Mike voice came in softly enough that Ron barely heard. "I've know Kim for a while. Never been her friend mind you but the girl's alright. She's a good fight though she does have a critical flaw. She doesn't see anything that's not right in front of her. She gets too focused."

"And this relates to Ron why?"

"Because he isn't her goal right now. She wants to be just like every other girl and that means the popular guys. Pretty boys like you for example. She'll never notice the guy to the side."

Ron felt crushed at that statement but took hope in it. Maybe Kim only needs to be awoken to her feelings. "You saying she loves the guy but doesn't realize it?" Josh voice rose up bringing Ron back into the conversation.

"You don't fall in love with best friends Josh. He'll always just be on the sidelines never in her sight. The girl can't possibly love that. No as much as it pains me life is not a romance movie. The underdog doesn't win in the end and the best friend doesn't get the girl. Ron Stoppable has as much chance of dating her as one of her brothers. Simple as that."

"Harsh man."

"Life sucks." Mike simple remark after summed up Ron feelings at this point.

'Always knew there was no way we'd get together. Hurts to have it spelled out like that though.'

Sighing Ron reached into the collar and took out the letter. "Rufus shred!"

The pink and yellow blob bobbed up again. Shaking off excess cheese it squeaked an affirmative and saluted. With a furry it ripped into the letter happy to be of help. It only paused when it felt the large drop of water hit it. Staring up it looked with confusion at its master.

IV.

Monte frowned as he stared at the peppy sales girl in front of him. Her brown highlighted hair showed clearly to him that this was not a stellar example of the human race.

"Excuse me Madam but can you provide me with assistance?" The sales girl looked up a smile on her face.

"Why yes sir. What is it you're looking for?"

"Well I was just wondering what gifts to give my children." Monte shuffled uncomfortable never feeling at ease when asking for help. His aloft look never faded from his face but the blasted twit just seemed to smile more at him.

Blinking her eyes in an attempt to gain his notice she moved towards him. "How old are your children sir?"

Taking a step back he cleared his throat. "Well the boys are ten and seven. My daughter is only three so I figure a simple gift for her would be best."

Nodding the sales girl beckoned him to follow her. Swaying her hips from side to side she clumsily attempted to seduce him. 'More like make me sick!'

Stopping before a bin she pulled out a stuff penguin. "How about this sir?"

Monte reached out and looked at it. Smiling he nodded and the girl just beamed at him. The twit giggled slightly and moved towards the toys department. Monte made a note that once business was done he'd have one of his minions kill the girl. He did no tolerate such base behavior in his presence. One reason why he'd have to kill that Possible girl soon.

Reaching out the girl took off the shelf a toy car and a rather odd looking robot. Pushing the button the girl held out the screaming toy. Monte was taken aback for a second by the blinking lights before reaching out and taking it.

"Are you sure they'd like this?" He looked at her his face clearly showing his obvious skepticism.

"I've got a couple of brothers that age too sir. I'm sure they'll love it." Smiling she made her way to the register.

"I'll ring you up sir. By the way is there anything else you want?"

"No I am satisfied at the moment." He avoided saying he was happy. Lying was a sin after all and should only be done when necessary. He almost laughed at that thought.

V.

Monte studied the glass globe in his hands. The crystal flower within reflected the light in a beautiful multicolored flow of light along its surface. Smiling he placed it back in its box.

"Well dear I hope you like this gift. It took me most of the day to find it." Bending forward Monty placed the box on the ground before him. Leaning back he studied the other 3 boxes perfectly lined up.

With a frown he reached forward and removed a vine that had managed to grow up on the stone in front of him. Without proper care this testimony to the ones he loves would soon fade. As long as he lived he would make sure that did not happen.

"Well I hope your all well. It's been hard this past year. That buffoon has again prevented me from grasping the power. I still in between options at this moment."

Leaning in Monty sighed as his hands brushed the stone in front of him. "It's at times like that I miss you all the most. I know you in a better place and I'd like to lie and say I'll go there two. The truth is though I'm comforted by the fact that those men will never see you all again."

Smiling Monty eyes moved across his beloved family. His pride and joys. "Don't worry though I will soon make him pay. You will be avenged."

Monty looked out over the snow covered field before him. Those gathered were allowed to rest in peace with only the wind to disturb their eternal slumber. Till the end of time they would know no more pain.

Looking back Monte frowned. His mind trying to alert him to things but the drugs he took kept him from grasping them. When his mind was no longer shrouded by the haze he did things he didn't want to. Things that he needed to do but that he would never show his family. It was not proper after all.

"Soon my loved ones. For he so loved the world he gave his one begotten son." Smiling Monty looked up towards the sky. "That is why I shall take that world away from you soon. As you took away mine so shall I yours."

With a smile on his face Monty rose from the graves and turned to head home. His silent quiet home.

The End

* * *

A/N: Well I wrote this for a contest. Hope you like it.

As for the Monty bit I've always liked to give my villains a reason to do what they do. The ultimate hate thing has always been interesting to me. How much more can you hurt God then to hurt the very children he loves after all. Takes a messed up mind to do that.

By the way Mike is a character of mine own creation. He serves a purpose in other stories but mostly I just couldn't think of a good character as Josh friend here. Brick doesn't do and that's the limit on possibilities for me.

Well hope you enjoyed it over all. As always Read and Review.

Disclaimer: KP is owned by Disney.


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